“I remember sitting in my high school classroom watching the ground invasion into Iraq and feeling like I wanted to be there. The patriotism that followed 9/11 was really strong and I knew I wanted to leave home and do something different than the rest of my class. I ended up enlisting in the Army and my first time leaving the country was to go to Baghdad for 15 months. I was active duty for nine years and have been in the reserves for the past eight. I met my husband while stationed in Germany and ended up becoming one of the first women to go through a special operations selection course for psychological operations. The military was a great experience, but when we left, my husband and I underestimated the impact of not having that military security blanket. On top of an already stressful transition, we also had a new baby to take care of so there was pressure to get settled and make up what we lost by leaving before retirement. When our daughter was a toddler, we tried to have another baby but actually had three devastating miscarriages. Two were pretty far into the second trimester of pregnancy and we did dozens of tests but the doctors were never able to tell us why it kept happening. Losing a baby like that was so difficult because one day you’re pregnant and then all of a sudden you’re not. People stare but don’t ask and nobody ever wants to talk about it. I actually wish it could be discussed more freely in general because when it happens, you really need people around to help get you through it.
